lonny23
10-25-2005, 11:23 AM
I'm here all the time and I think I should give back to the board and I wanted to post some thoughts. The Air Force is making all of us watch a sexual assault/harrassment video and I did it over here yesterday morning. Actually, I was watching the video and the World Series at the same time! :D The video didn't make me think any differently, but it did make me want to post this. Guys and girls, you have to be careful. Notice I said both sexes, because both do it. I've had events by both sexes happen to me that can be construed as sexual harrassment. The big difference is they didn't have a lasting emotional impact upon me like they usually do on women. Many people do things and don't even realize what they did.
Jokes can be very hurtful. Women don't like to hear they're sleeping around and a lot of people don't take gay jokes well. That stuff where you say women should be in the kitchen cooking or why don't you go make me some coffee doesn't cut it. Both sexes deserve respect, but often we demean the other sex for looks and intelligence. More and more women are crude about their thoughts toward a certain man and he can be offended. Women want to be appreciated for their character and mind and not so much for their physical appearance. You have to get past the outside looks. It's not flattering to talk about what you want to do with so and so. Talk amongst friends gets passed around and can scar a person's psyche. Harassment is bad, but assault is worse and many people don't realize they do it.
A lot of what guys say is consensual sex is actually ****. **** is not just a guy with a mask and a knife. Most of the time, it's a person you know or trust that betrays you. The guys with the knife are a minority of rapists, but they are repeat offenders until caught. Among the guys you trust, some do it in certain situations, but most are predators that find easy targets and work to get what they want. **** is forcing yourself upon a person that's unconscious, asleep, disoriented such as drunk, or who refuses either verbally or physically.
Let me go into detail. Drugging people or getting them drunk to get what you want is ****. Many women are flirts and some go way too far in teasing you, but you must stop if they say to stop. Otherwise, you might find yourself in a world of trouble. Many women say no and then stop fighting. That's not a sign they now agree to have sex and most of the time is them finally giving up because you overpowered them. That's still ****. Don't ignore the stop signs. Don't just take the attitude that most women say no when they really want to say yes.
Guys don't cover for your friends and congratulate them for scoring. If you know they're shady and get people drunk and take advantage of situations, talk to them. Warn others about these predators. Girls watch out for your friends. Don't let them just go home with a stranger and regret it later on. Many guys will offer to drive you home because you're not capable of doing it yourself.
Most rapes go unreported because the victims feel so bad and dirty. They don't want to be looked at in a different light and suffer because of it. If you know somebody this happened to or if it happened to you, report it and get help. There are a lot of deep emotional scars that go with **** and you need healing. Potential signs of **** is a friend that's no longer happy, being scared to be alone and especially being around the opposite sex. Touching will trigger fear in them. If your friend doesn't go out anymore, they could've been raped. These signs are the same for suicide and that's a potential consequence of ****, too.
Jokes can be very hurtful. Women don't like to hear they're sleeping around and a lot of people don't take gay jokes well. That stuff where you say women should be in the kitchen cooking or why don't you go make me some coffee doesn't cut it. Both sexes deserve respect, but often we demean the other sex for looks and intelligence. More and more women are crude about their thoughts toward a certain man and he can be offended. Women want to be appreciated for their character and mind and not so much for their physical appearance. You have to get past the outside looks. It's not flattering to talk about what you want to do with so and so. Talk amongst friends gets passed around and can scar a person's psyche. Harassment is bad, but assault is worse and many people don't realize they do it.
A lot of what guys say is consensual sex is actually ****. **** is not just a guy with a mask and a knife. Most of the time, it's a person you know or trust that betrays you. The guys with the knife are a minority of rapists, but they are repeat offenders until caught. Among the guys you trust, some do it in certain situations, but most are predators that find easy targets and work to get what they want. **** is forcing yourself upon a person that's unconscious, asleep, disoriented such as drunk, or who refuses either verbally or physically.
Let me go into detail. Drugging people or getting them drunk to get what you want is ****. Many women are flirts and some go way too far in teasing you, but you must stop if they say to stop. Otherwise, you might find yourself in a world of trouble. Many women say no and then stop fighting. That's not a sign they now agree to have sex and most of the time is them finally giving up because you overpowered them. That's still ****. Don't ignore the stop signs. Don't just take the attitude that most women say no when they really want to say yes.
Guys don't cover for your friends and congratulate them for scoring. If you know they're shady and get people drunk and take advantage of situations, talk to them. Warn others about these predators. Girls watch out for your friends. Don't let them just go home with a stranger and regret it later on. Many guys will offer to drive you home because you're not capable of doing it yourself.
Most rapes go unreported because the victims feel so bad and dirty. They don't want to be looked at in a different light and suffer because of it. If you know somebody this happened to or if it happened to you, report it and get help. There are a lot of deep emotional scars that go with **** and you need healing. Potential signs of **** is a friend that's no longer happy, being scared to be alone and especially being around the opposite sex. Touching will trigger fear in them. If your friend doesn't go out anymore, they could've been raped. These signs are the same for suicide and that's a potential consequence of ****, too.